A split second

How do you cope in panic situation? I mean how well do you handle panic moment? Are you able to function well in panic moment? How fast your reaction is?

I have this questions because I just realized how I almost always stumble upon panic moments. I thought I'm just clumsy but no, it's like fate has decided that my middle name is panic. The weird thing is, when you're supposed to feel terrified and full of terror, but there is this one second when you're in panic, it's like the world stand still and you feel like you're in a vacuum zone where everything is senseless. No sound heard and you don't even feel the air blowing. Numb.

Like last saturday I was driving and trying to cross a busy two way road. It was a bit of a hill and I wasn't driving my own car. You know how foreign driving someone else's car is. As soon as there's a chance I could pass, I stepped hard on the gas. The car lurched forward but fate made it that my left feet slipped of the clutch. Thus the engine died. And I was in the middle of a two way road. With an oncoming lorry from the right side and parade of cars from the left side. Time suddenly stood still and I could feel my eyes going wide. It was just for a split second, but I snapped out of it and the next second I was frantically starting the engine back. Pushed hard the gear to reverse and reversing the car. Then hitting the brake, I sat still watching the lorry and cars pass by.

And I still remember as clear as crystal, when I was little and I was sitting on the woodbench in front of my babysitter's house with my older sister. She was sitting on the bench opposite of me, her feet dangling not reaching the floor. A black snake appear out of nowhere behind her, its upper half body already erect aiming at her feet. I remember the panic rising in me and I remember the split second that the world stood still. I didn't move a muscle and I just told my sister "Sist, don't move your feet." Luckily she stop swaying her foot and as soon as the snake seems to retreat I yelled "Quick, lift up your feet!". Then the pakcik at the next house heard me yelling and came to our rescue. He killed the snake.

Over the years there are a few other occasions as well that force me to look back and be extra careful. But I know that my hands are quicker than my brain. In such situation I won't scream, instead I flail around, grab what I should grab and propel to safety or make the situation as safe as could be. I guess, I could handle panic well. Until now at least.

But nothing could match the panic moment of the Japanese last friday when the tsunami slammed over the whole city, housing area and villages of north-east Japan. How gripping the terror must be. When the wall of water is suddenly 10m high above you, where could you run? I mean, could you even run? Terrifying, isn't it. Let's pray for the people in Japan as they face this sudden terrible disaster. And let's pray for ourselves too that death wouldn't knock so suddenly without the chance for us to say His name and repent.

Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been

~Mark Twain, Following the Equator

Today, let me share with you a few tips on "ageing gracefully, the French way" that I read in the Sun yesterday. It was summarised from an article by the New York Times few days ago.

Here we are:

10 tips to age gracefully

1. Take care of yourself and be aware of your own feminity. (Couldn't agree more)

2. Avoid heavy make-up. (Hmm, makes sense)

3. Use lotion instead of soap. (I still believe in facial cleanser in this hot humid weather of Malaysia. But yes, moisturizer is essential)

4. Rinse your skin with cold water to improve circulation. (Fine, it's not like I have water heater anyway=p)

5. Eat fresh foods in small portions (The author of the article admits, however, that many French women help nature along with the aid of pills or other treatments.) (Yup, vitamin helps)

6. Go to the spa. ($$$)

7. Go to the dermatologist. ($$$$$$$$$$$)

8. If it has to be plastic surgery, "the objective is to look like themselves - not someone 20 years younger." (Never an option, I'll embrace my wrinkles. Hehe)

9. Don't dress like your daughter and pay attention to great accessories (good jewellery, statement shoes, a nicely wrapped scarf). (I like!)

10. Wear sexy underwear. As the French writer Francoise Sagan wrote: "A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to take it off you." (Ooooh, no comment. Yet=p)

Ciao=)

Nasab

Sungguh saya sangat terkejut membaca berita hari ini. 17,303 anak luar nikah melayu/tidak sah taraf didaftarkan sepanjang tahun 2009. Seriously?! Wah, scary sungguh. Bagi saya begitu besar angka tersebut. Tidak perlu dibandingkan dengan jumlah keseluruhan penduduk Malaysia. Sebagai orang Islam, jumlah sebegini sangat menakutkan, sangat menyedihkan dan sangat memalukan.

Bagaimana ni? Saya rungsing memikirkannya. Bagi saya isu ini tidak terhenti setakat kelahiran anak luar nikah sahaja. Ia melibatkan nasab keturunan. Apatah lagi bila anak-anak kecil ini ditinggalkan oleh ibu atau bapa yang tidak bertanggungjawab. Maka kebanyakkan mereka tidak mengenali bapa yang 'angkat kaki' apabila teman wanita hamil atau ibu yang meninggalkan anak di tepi surau. Bagaimana apabila masa berlalu dan anak-anak ini sudah besar kemudian melanjutkan pelajaran atau bekerja. Bagaimana jika mereka tidak mengenali adik beradik sebapa? Bagaimana jika mereka bercinta dengan adik beradik sendiri tanpa disedari akibat tidak pernah bertemu ibu kandung sendiri? Nauzubillah. Caca merba keturunan jadinya.

Islam menyarankan salah satu ciri-ciri memilih jodoh ialah dengan melihat keturunannya. Seorang rakan saya selalu berkata pada zaman akan datang mungkin kita perlu menjodohkan anak-anak kita dengan anak-anak rakan terdekat yang dikenali sahaja kerana kita kenal siapa ibu bapanya dan kita tahu bagaimana keturunannya. Peri pentingnya keturunan bukan kerana nama atau pangkat tetapi kerana darah dagingnya. Seboleh-bolehnya kita mahu memelihara keturunan agar zuriat yang lahir nanti bersih dan insyaAllah menjadi orang yang beriman dan bertakwa.

Pentingnya keturunan juga kerana ia berkait dengan kesihatan. Dengan mengetahui asal usul, sekurang-kurangnya kita dapat mengetahui sekiranya ada sebarang penyakit keturunan. Selain itu, saya pasti ramai sedia maklum kita tidak digalakkan berkahwin dengan saudara terdekat. Setakat ini saya pernah berjumpa dengan beberapa pesakit kanak-kanak yang mempunyai pelbagai penyakit dan sindrom yang apabila dilihat sejarah, ibu bapa mereka mempunyai ikatan persaudaraan.

Apa akan jadi pada generasi akan datang? Bagaimana hendak menyedarkan masyarakat Islam kita. Masalah zina ini bukan terhad pada golongan muda mudi sahaja, malah ada yang telah berpangkat datuk. Sudah tua tetapi masih lalai dengan godaan dunia. Masih ligat berlibur. Ada juga yang tidak tahu hukum hakam agama. Ingat lagi satu kes tahun lepas di Pahang di mana seorang bapa mertua berkahwin dengan menantunya sendiri setelah kematian anak lelaki beliau. Alasannya takut tidak manis dipandang orang bila dia selalu datang menziarahi cucu-cucu di rumah menantu. Ya Allah, kalau perkara asas sebegini pun tidak tahu, bagaimana?! Cucu-cucu pun keliru datuk telah menjadi 'bapa tiri'. Nasib baik ada jiran-jiran yang prihatin dan melaporkan kepada pihak berkuasa. Kalaulah ada anak yang lahir hasil hubungan itu?

Sesungguhnya begitu besar cabaran di zaman moden ini. Agama saja yang dapat menyelamatkan kita. Sekarang ini ramai juga golongan ibu bapa muda yang sedar akan pentingnya didikan agama. Ramai muslim yang berpendidikan dan berjaya dalam bidang profesional menekankan Islam dalam didikan mereka. Saya harap ada lebih ramai ibu bapa sebegini, yang dapat menjadi contoh tauladan yang baik kepada anak-anak mereka. Sesungguhnya saya takut memikirkan bagaimana zaman anak-anak kita nanti.

Ya Allah Ya Rahim, peliharalah keturunan kami.

What's done is undone

Have you ever feel like you wish some things never happen? Have you ever wonder why oh why it wasn't what you thought it was? Have you ever felt stunned because the things that were special to you wasn't as special as it seem to be? Have you ever hope that you can turn back the time and deal with the damage right there and then? Well, I have. Lots of time actually. Hehe.

The thing is, it's life. It's reality. We won't always get what we want the way we want. Those good things are mostly dreams. Fairy tales. Not everyone are lucky to have it all. But it's good to have dreams and sometimes to believe in fairy tales. That way we still have hope and life wouldn't be so dull. But it still hurts when dreams are crushed. Right?

It's important that we should always hope for the best in future. What's life without tears and joys? We whine and complain but I realized I should be thankful with what I have. I am, really I am. What's done is undone. Get over it. Heh.

Have you ever wish that you can celebrate prosperity all year long? Kah kah.

Love, Trust, Honesty

What happens when love stands but with no trust and honesty? What happens when love gets betrayed? I believe it's a question that cannot be answered easily.

Recently, a friend of mine got married again. Yes, again. It's just a coincidence that we found out. His wife happens to be a friend of mine too. He divorced her (for the second time!) which he married only 2 or 3 years ago to get married to the new one. The thing is, before this we have been hearing about this guy flirting and cheating around behind his wife at his workplace. Not only ordinary flirting as some of his act are unacceptable as a muslim. We were quite shocked since he doesn't look like that kind of person way back in UKM. Then they got divorced but make amends soon after only a few months. I know she loves him very much. I guess this time she just couldn't take it anymore.

His new wife is my junior. Oh my, have the world gone smaller? I'm really confuse as to why she accept him as they work in the same company and she should have known about his philandering behaviour. I don't believe in the statement 'love is blind'. In this world now, love cannot be blind. Well, people make choices in their life and we may not understand it. I just wish she would understand the feeling of another woman before she got involved with the man.

A woman must value her dignity and never be the third person. Even if you like a person so very much, be it someone's husband, fiance or even just boyfriend. Please respect the fact that the person is already in a relationship. Stop right there. Because if you didn't, it just shows how desperate you are and how selfish you are. A selfish person who didn't care about other person as long as she gets what she wants. Yes, jodoh di tangan tuhan (the simplest excuse). But, that's where akal and iman takes place. You're not forced, it's you yourself who makes the choice with your own brain. And you have Iman, to reason your feelings. Don't you feel guilty with the other woman? I myself have liked someone before but I never go beyond when I know he's already seeing someone. Besides, what goes around may comes around.

To the man, I simply wish he will honestly love his new wife and be a good husband. It's enough that you've destroyed a good woman's heart. Please stop breaking others.

Love, trust, honesty. They stand strong and well together. I just hope everybody would see it like this.

:: Picture googled